COLTS CALDWELL PURPOSELY LOSES GAME!

There is no reason in hell or heaven for the call that Jim Caldwell pulled when he pulled Peyton Manning out of the game vs the Jets.

Season ticket holders would do well to call Colts ownership and ask for refunds.

Absolute b*llshit.

DOC RIVERS’ SON A MESS @ INDIANA UNIVERSITY

Thinking the sunk Indiana University basketball program needed the scion of Greatness, IU Coach Tom Crean took Jeremiah Rivers, and IU has suffered for that decision.

Rivers transferred from Georgetown – not enough playing time, they say.

Now, given a chance to watch him make passes into the stands and consistently miss free throws, what we have is a player seriously lacking fundamentals, a “gimme da ball” player who doesn’t deserve the ball.

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Rivers single handedly just lost the Loyola game due to missed FT’s and sloppy play.

Give him back to Georgetown.

TIGER GETS MONEY FROM PUBLIC – PUBLIC DESERVES EXPLANATIONS

Tiger Woods in his child-like way thinks he can just plead privacy and escape public scrutiny for crass behavior.

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We here on the Farm know better: Tiger Woods’ monies come from the public, and it is the public he answers to.

You cannot collect millions – nay, billions – from the public, then tell them to go to the devil when your private behavior turns your life into a circus act because of your ignorant ways.

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Tiger Woods has been acting childish on the courses and off.

Time to pay the piper.

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“This is OnStar Mister Woods. We see you’ve been in an accident. We’ve sent your wife out with a seven iron to extricate you from your vehicle.”

PATRIOTS VS ORLEANS? – PATRIOTS PUT IN THEIR PLACE WHILE GRUDEN SQUEALS!

The Patriots were put in their place by New Orleans.

The Patriots looked like just some other team.

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Okay, and Gruden did nothing but squeal like a cheerleader again the entire program……..

TIGER CRASHES – “ONSTAR” DISPATCHES ANGRY WIFE W/GOLF CLUBS TO RESCUE

Yeah, “OnStar.”

Now your commercials will be played against Tiger trapped in his Escalade with an angry wife busting car windows out with a couple well-placed golf club irons.

How does that sit with “OnStar?”

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“We see you’ve been in an accident, and we’ve dispatched your angry wife with golf clubs to rescue you!”

ESPN’S ADAM SCHEFTER LOSES “INSTANT TAN” – ALONG WITH OWN MOTHER’S RESPECT

ESPN’s Adam Schefter – after laborious consultations with Hollywood’s best colorists – has lightened up on his make-up.

Schefter’s mother told him this was necessary if he was EVER to be taken seriously in The Man’s World Of Sports.

“Sonny,” she told little Adam as she poured his favorite maple syrup over her home-made pancakes, “You’re ALWAYS going to sound like a jack-ass, but at least you don’t have to LOOK like one!“

GRUDEN “LOSES IT” DURING MNF BROADCAST!

It happened when Tirico and Jaworski both declared they would no longer address booth buddy Jon Gruden as “Coach.”

Jaws and Tirico summarily decided Gruden had lost any respect they might have had for him, so from tonite’s Redskins/Philly game, they would only address Gruden as “Johnny” or “The Groody.”

Gruden – on air – did a bitch-fest to the MNF producer who refused to enter the fray.

Gruden’s beet-red face nearly exploded as the cameras caught him cryin’ and bitchin’ at Jaworski and Tirico.

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Cutting quickly to a commercial, when MNF returned Jon Gruden had been replaced by an actor in a Daffy Duck outfit.

And….that that-that’s ALL folks!!!

MORE MNF: CAMERA ANGLES, REPLAYS, ALL SUCK – MNF DIRECTOR SUCKS

This SD/Denver game was so chock full of crap replays – or NO replays- camera shots without players evident, camera shots without perspective.

Whoever directed this football game apparently practiced his/her camera work on playgrounds and skateboard tournaments.

SHUT GRUDEN UP! GRUDEN OPENS MOUTH: OUT COMES SUGAR-COATED, ICE CREAM-FLAVORED, CANDY CORN SQUEALS!

So, when America is looking for football analysts, we get Jon Gruden squealing like a tight-skirted teenie-bopper.

Jon Gruden opens his mouth and out comes sugar-coated, ice cream flavored, candy corn squeals.

Someone – like G. Gordon Liddy – please shut Jon Gruden the f*ck up.

JON GRUDEN WEARS A BRA – OR IS IT A “MANZIERE?”

You read it at “ESPN’s A JOKE” first:

Jon Gruden wears a bra.

Well, he calls it a “manziere.”

But he’s NOT fooling anyone.